You are not your diagnosis and it does not have to define you or your life
The Light Within
For me my light is my soul, it is my connection to the divine and you can knock me unconscious, you can beat me black and blue, you can defile my body but you can NEVER turn the light of my soul off.
When I realised this, it was the biggest turning point in my healing journey
When I embraced the knowledge that I am indeed a soul having a human experience
That there is no death only physical death
That my soul will go on to live in a new incarnation
That is the moment I started to release the fear and allow love in.
I think on some level I had always known this
But I came to really KNOW it when I attended a weekend retreat in Oxford 13 years ago.
Inner Peace Inner Power was the name of the retreat.
I had no idea what to expect when I arrived, I had never gone to anything like this before in my life.
My friends and family were concerned that I might be walking into a cult.
I had searched the internet for inspiration and came across this retreat that was free, you just paid a donation.
That’s what was freaking everyone out.
‘There’s no such thing as a free lunch.’
‘Be careful it’s a bit suspicious that they are not charging’
But I went with my intuition.
I knew everything was working out perfectly for me and I trusted that I was being divinely guided.
Besides, I had my car. If it didn’t feel right I could jump back in and head home.
WHAT LEAD ME TO A MEDITATION RETREAT IN THE FIRST PLACE?
I had had so many years of therapy and counselling.
I’d dealt with my issues, understood them on an intellectual level and yet I felt empty.
Some days I could feel the physical emptiness and would hug myself around my belly in the hope of filling the void.
I had nothing to fill the emptiness anymore.
I didn’t drink
I didn’t take drugs
I wasn’t having lots of casual sex anymore
There was no drama in my life
And yet this hole was getting bigger and bigger.
The meditation retreat was an experiment.
And what I found there, blew me away.
It was really simple.
I was a soul in a human body.
The bad stuff that happened to me, happened to my body, my soul remained untouched, untainted by the childhood abuse and trauma, undamaged by the multitude of unhealthy relationships.
My soul was just a point of light within this body radiating the vibration of peace, love and joy.
And the only reason that I felt an absence of those in my life was because my focus had been elsewhere.
When I returned to the truth of who I really was, I was able to release the desire to die, I was able to release the depression and anxiety and I was able to start embracing a new life of joy, love and peace.
I truly wanted to live again, to be part of the human race, to catch up on all that I had missed out on from those years of being locked in the prison of depression.
I wanted to jump for joy
I wanted to shout it from the rooftops
And then 2 weeks later my back tire blew on the fast lane of the M25 during one of its busiest times at the weekend.
The car crashed head first into the central reservation and spun round, coming to a stop straddled across the middle and fast lane.
How I didn’t cause a multiple car pile up I will never know.
Miraculously not one single car crashed and I was left without even a tiny scratch, the car however was squashed up like a crushed coke can.
On the moment of impact I felt no fear, only a surrendering into peace and a willingness to let go.
When I reflect back on that moment now I understand that I needed a total surrender and faith in what lies beyond the physical realm.
This surrender and faith led me to seeking an extraordinary life, one in which I am honoured to support others on their journey home, back to the truth of who they really are.
A Cautionary Tale of Stress
‘I thrive on stress’
Is what I used to say.
It felt so true at the time.
I was great in a crisis.
Always at my best, most clear headed and highly functioning when I was fire fighting.
So, that is exactly what I managed to create in my life.
One crisis after another.
At first it was the personal crisis, the emotional breakdown that ended up with a psychiatric addmission following a binge of sex and drugs and alcohol.
I survived that crisis, it wasn’t pleasant.
It was excruciatingly painful actually.
But I got through it.
I survived and in the process of healing I went on to work with a mental health service user organisation.
It was the shock of the psychiatric stay that did it.
I was horrified at how easy it was to lose yourself in a system, that no longer sees you as a person but as conglomerate of your symptoms to be treated and medicated away.
On the other side of that experience I knew that my purpose in life was to help others, to support them in their time of despair and to provide a space where they could feel safe and contained to just ‘BE’
And so my relationship with stress and crisis changed as I became the project manager for the UK’s first ever service user led, run and managed crisis house.
It was amazing, it was beautiful, it was fulfilling and it was all consuming.
I put myself under a different kind of stress then.
But that was ok, because I was helping others and my life had meaning and purpose.
And so what if I was working 70 hours a week, never switching off, never having time to relax or chill out.
I was living out my purpose.
We lost funding for the project, it closed and I was burnt out, exhausted.
Taking two naps a day became my new norm.
It crept up on me so sneakily.
I didn’t want to give a label of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome or ME.
I was just tired.
Tired because I’d been working so hard.
And now that the project was over I could rest and recuperate, get my energy levels back to how they were before.
Actually how were they before?
When was the last time I felt that consistent vibrancy for life?
I had no idea.
So I started to take care of myself, get plenty of rest, exercise, eat well, meditate.
But my energy didn’t come back and for 12 years or maybe even more, I felt constantly tired.
Forever negotiating a compromise with myself if I were to have a night out.
But it couldn’t be stress, could it?
I had changed my life so much, changed my job, changed my life partner, changed my diet, changed my outlook on life.
Definitely not stress.
Or so I thought.
And then I came across this strange tapping thing called Emotional Freedom Technique.
It intrigued me because it works on the physical and the emotional body at the same time by stimulating acupressure points whilst you are talking about an issue or a problem you have and connecting to the emotions of it.
I wanted to know more.
And after attending a 3 day practitioner training course I was completely blown away.
Because what I never realised before was how much our past experiences were unconsciously triggering a stress response in our bodies.
And that the accumulation of all this stress leads to all manner of physical dis-ease within us.
Despite having years of talking therapy and counselling to heal my experiences of childhood trauma, I was still constantly being triggered by things showing up in my current life.
Wow, this was huge!
So I went all in and over that weekend I tapped on painful memories of the abuse, on physical conditions that I had and on personal relationships.
But I never tapped on the exhaustion or the chronic fatigue, because it had become so part of my ’normal’ that I barely even noticed it anymore.
It wasn’t until about a week or two after the 3 day intensive training that I realised it had gone.
Just like that, I no longer needed to take afternoon naps or go to sleep at 9pm at night!
In releasing the old trauma from my physical body, I enabled the energy to start flowing freely again.
My life changed so completely from that moment.
I never felt stressed ever again!
Sorry that’s not true.
Of course I feel stress from time to time, but I am aware of it now.
Aware of what the stress feels like in my body again and so I am able to respond to de-activate the fight, flight or freeze response, to bring my body back into a state of calm and resourcefulness.
And that feels so good :)
A Tale of Two Expos
How can the same event in two consecutive years yield two very different outcomes?
Last year in March 2017 I exhibited and spoke at my very 1st big event.
The Best You Expo was held at the Excel and saw approximately 10,000 people over the course of the weekend.
I had over 130 sign up to my free prize draw and on my email list with approximately 75 people attending my 40 minute talk.
The feedback was great, there was much enthusiasm for what I had been talking about.
I followed all the usual marketing and sales guidelines; offering a short free video program, followed by a free Masterclass, followed by an invitation to purchase an online program at a low cost price with an equally low cost 1:1 upgrade.
I followed all the rules that say you have to nurture the relationship before you ask to commit to a high ticket program.
I didn’t sell one single program.
I was baffled
At £25 my low cost offer was still too much for most people or so they said.
Without making any return on my investment you may be surprised to learn that I re-invested for a 2nd year.
I did 😬
And it was scary because the stakes were even higher for me this time round.
I had a shorter time slot and a smaller pitch, just a table outside a workshop room.
The venue was moved to Olympia and the footfall increased by another 5,000 over the whole weekend.
The number of sign ups this year were less than half at just 73.
But my talk was packed out, no spare seats, people standing at the back and sides.
I ditched all the rules, went into the presentation unrehearsed, swore a lot and finished with a massive queue of people wanting to talk to me, stopping me on my way out of the workshop room to say what an inspiring talk it was, how refreshing it was to hear someone keeping it real and raw.
I still can’t remember what I said!
I had 23 people sign up for a free strategy call.
Several dropped out so I ended up speaking to about 15 people all in all.
And within 2 weeks I had more than doubled my return on investment with just 3 clients.
What was the difference?
The 1st year I was talking about Money Blocks because I thought that would be a subject that most people could relate to.
As an EFT / Tapping practitioner with a wealth of personal experience in a number of areas I was not limited or restricted to what I could talk about.
But it wasn’t a subject matter that I felt particularly aligned to.
The 2nd year the name of the talk was channeled to me ‘From Survival to Thrivival’
I felt drawn to share what I knew from both personal and professional experience of the patterns of stress response and survival, talking about my own experiences of overcoming childhood trauma and the legacy it had left behind.
The coaches I was working with were encouraging me to embrace my truth, to clear any shame I was holding onto and to speak from the heart.
So that’s what I did.
I embraced all of ME.
I was brave enough to share my story from a place of knowing that my soul purpose in life has been to transform the pain and trauma I have experienced so that I can support my clients to make those deep inner transformations for themselves.
And the only strategy that I used was that of taking aligned action, even when it made no sense, even when it was scary as fuck, even when ‘the experts’ were telling me to do it this way or that way.
I worked with people who held me to find my OWN way and the results have been phenomenal.
Now it is time for me to share what worked with you, so that you can have a play at trying out some techniques, so that you too can find your OWN WAY.
Join me on Monday 19th March at 11am GMT for my SOULIGNMENT Masterclass where I will be sharing one particular technique which I fondly refer to as my Fast Track to Manifestation.
To register for this Masterclass use the link below:
Dodging Doctors and Diagnoses — Diary of my crazy life
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times”
That famous line from a Tale of Two Cities, pretty much summed up my time spent in a Psychiatric Unit back in 2001.
How the fuck did my life come to this point?
I’d lost the plot completely.
Couldn’t even remember how I had got there.
Oh yes that was right.
After a binge of cocaine and sex, I totally blew my mind.
A psychotic episode was the technical term.
Alone and afraid I sat in that lonely cell. Erm, I mean room.
Screams and weeping and wailing coming from the room next to me.
I didn’t belong here — I wasn’t ‘mad’ like the rest of them.
But maybe I was, maybe I was exactly in the right place at the right time.
It all seems so long ago now.
I’d split up from my husband, he’d taken the kids away for a holiday, found someone else not long after our separation and I think I pretty much decided, that I may as well be dead.
I could not live this life of misery anymore.
Only I was too much of a coward to pull the trigger or pop some pills, so blowing my mind on drugs seemed like a pretty good idea at the time.
Exactly how was that the best of times?
Really sounds bleak to me.
It was the best of times because I made a decision to LIVE
I made that decision there and then that this was far enough, that I would sink no further down, that I would do whatever it took to find my happy place — I almost followed that with ‘once again’
But the truth was I had never known a happy place without the use of chemically induced stimulants or large quantities of alcohol.
I come out of hospital a changed woman.
Really? I don’t think so.
Came out scared, terrified that if I fucked up this time the kids would be taken away from me for ever, like so many other women I had met on the ward.
I didn’t even know that was legal, but apparently, it was.
You have a breakdown and instead of providing you with support for your family, they send your kids off to be adopted — not fostered, adopted — because you’re not fit to be a mother.
How could I be so naïve as to think that I would be safe under the care of mental health services.
I felt like I was part of some terrifying reality game show and that I had to learn the rules pretty damn quick in order to survive and keep my kids.
‘You want my advice?’ asked a rather sad looking Asian man, sitting on the bench outside.
I didn’t really, but he gave it anyway.
‘Do you want to get out of here alive?’
‘YES’ I replied wide-eyed
‘Then show up for every mealtime, eat the shit that they put on your plate; get up every morning; shower; dress; put on your make-up; take your meds; do what they tell you; sign up for every therapeutic group there is and earn your points to escape’
‘Oh that’s ok I don’t really have to do all that, I’m here as a voluntary patient. I can leave whenever I like.’
‘That’s what I thought’ he said, ‘Until I told them I wanted to leave and they stuck a 6-month section on me and forced me to stay here for my own safety. That was a year ago. You’re under their control now, their rules and you gotta show them you are well enough before they will let you leave.’
This is not what I signed up for — I’m outta here, I know what’s best for me.
But when I go back to the ward and start packing my bags the nurse pops her head in and says, ‘What do you think you are doing?’
‘I’m packing up to go home. Thank you for letting me stay here for a few nights but I don’t think this is really right for me.’
She raises an eyebrow, hands on hips and says, ‘Oh I don’t think so honey. You try to walk out that door and we’ll slap a section 3 on you.’
Extract taken from my upcoming book. Want to read more when it is published? Follow me on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/JaneJacksonSoulignment/
What Conditions Are You Putting On Your Own Alignment?
Actually it’s not just Alignment but your own inner peace and happiness?
I had a journaling fest on Sunday morning. After about 10 pages and 10 minutes of tapping, I came to the revelation that I’ve been placing conditions upon my alignment and blocking myself from receiving.
Conditions that if X number of people buy a place at the Tap Into Your Vision workshop then that means I’m in alignment.
But not only that, that it also means I am WORTHY!
I realised that I had lost a bit of faith because of the conditions I was putting on myself.
The download in the Summer about SOULIGNMENT™️ and the FREE 5 Day Journey into SOULIGNMENT™️ became meaningless in my head because I didn’t attract one single client to pay to work with me.
(Despite the incredible feedback from people who had found it to be hugely valuable)
It’s a bit like when I placed my ‘worthiness’ as a coach upon getting a DISTINCTION in both my Personal Performance Coaching Diploma and Small Business Coaching Diploma.
I got the distinction in the 1st diploma but the small business diploma I completed whilst my husband was recovering from a massive heart attack, I only achieved a MERIT. 1.5 points short of a DISTINCTION, but in my eyes I had failed.
Because of the CONDITIONS I was placing upon myself!
But alignment with my soul has nothing to do with that!
It’s not about the number of clients I work with or the amount of money I get paid to work with them.
What if I won the lottery, does that mean I’m not aligned with my soul?
Does that mean I am not WORTHY?
The clients, the money, the abundance that’s all the by-products of Alignment, not the reason for it!
So I have one place sold for the workshop on Thursday and that one place came as a result of a one minute pitch in a networking meeting when I really wasn’t ‘feeling’ it.
And I know we (me and Rebecca Fry) can make this the best experience ever for this one client.
I’ve just been reminded of how I used to feel sad for the kids when they were younger, that at Christmas it was just them and me and what a bit of an anticlimax that must have been for them.
But as they grew older they said they loved the quiet time, the attention and not having to share me with anyone as opposed to the craziness of Christmas at their Dads surrounded by Aunts, Uncles and Cousins, who they loved dearly, but meant that they had no time to play with their new toys!
So this one person on the workshop will get treated to a VIP experience and probably walk away wanting more! And raving about it.
I needed to overcome my ego to write this email.
My ego that says, how can anyone look up to you as a leader or an expert in your field if you share the TRUTH?
But my SOUL says share it because this is what we all struggle with.
And my coach reflected these words back to me this morning
“Alignment is unconditional. RECEIVING is unconditional.
Learning to hold the paradox between not needing the clients / money / stuff and KNOWING that your alignment will bring it, is powerful.
It’s not either or, it’s both and.
Be in deep appreciation of your client. Delighted with what you have and ready for more. And stay open to receiving more” ❤️
And I am!
I am in deep appreciation for this one client who will be joining us on Thursday for the winter solstice, creating magic through vision boards and tapping away resistance, to get to the deeper TRUTH
I am delighted that she will be having this amazing VIP experience.
And I am also ready for more to join us in the magic as well 😉
And if that’s you, then the booking details are in the link below.
TAP INTO YOUR VISION WORKSHOP
PS when you purchase a full price ticket now you get one absolutely FREE for the Online version of the workshop to be held in January — you can keep this for yourself or gift it to a friend 😊
Take care for now,
Manifesting and Unconscious Beliefs how to get around it.
And if you want to join us on the London Tap into Your Vision Workshop on Thursday 21st December here’s the link http://bit.ly/2juhVyz
What Happens When You Mix Together Vision Boards and Energy Work?
You get a bit of magic happening!
I’ve always liked playing with vision boards, but never really took them that seriously, until I started combing them with energy work.
That’s when I started to notice that things I had been placing on my vision board were coming into my reality without really forcing or pushing.
This was the vision board that I made on the 1st January 2015.
At that time the only thing that I was really certain about was that we were going to New Zealand to see my daughter and probably have a few days in Bali on the way home.
I really wanted to get married, but my partner at the time didn’t believe in marriage. I was trying to get my head around accepting this, but secretly wanting the security of being married.
We’d also spent a lovely holiday on a canal boat a few years before and I dreamed of owning our own boat. My partner didn’t really share this dream either.
So this was the vision board I created and then put it to one side and forgot about it (not sharing it with anyone).
Later that year in November 2015, whilst in New Zealand my partner surprised me with an engagement ring on my 50th birthday and as if that wasn’t exciting enough, surprised me with a secret wedding in Bali 😲
On our return from our travels, my new husband randomly said one Sunday morning, ‘let’s buy a canal boat’
So we did 😲
Here’s the evidence of the dreams to reality, photos taken exactly one year apart.
If you want to create your own magic like I did, come and join me and my fellow conscious creator Rebecca Fry on our brand new IN-PERSON live workshop in London on 21st December 2017.
TAP INTO YOUR VISION LIVE IN LONDON WORKSHOPThursday 21st December, 10:30am to 3:00pm (Islignton venue tbc)
Not only will you be making a beautiful vision board of the life you want to create, but we will also be tapping away any resistance or dis-belief and embedding new positive affirmations into your mind so that you are open and ready to receive and accept the life you dream of.
The FULL cost of this UNIQUE workshop is £111
But you can grab a place now for £77
This early bird price is available until 12pm on the 12th of December or until all of the 8 places have been taken! (One place went 5 minutes after publishing it on Eventbrite!)
To register and claim you place at the table to create the life of your dreams, follow this link here http://bit.ly/2juhVyz
How Humiliation at School can Still Impact on our Adult Lives
This morning I was reflecting on a session that I had with a client yesterday.
It never ceases to amaze me how powerful those childhood incidents can impact on every area of our lives.
She came to me because she was only too aware of her reluctance and resistance to writing blogs, writing on Facebook or other social media platforms.
And this reluctance and resistance is impacting on her well-being business big time.
During our session together we were able to identify the root cause of this resistance.
Tracing it back to early childhood and moving to a new school at the age of 9, where she had to stand next to the teacher in front of the whole class to read out aloud.
She was told that her reading age was that of a 7 year old and that she had to go to remedial reading lessons.
Those remedial lessons were torture for her.
She would look at the words and they would get muddled up in her brain and she just didn’t understand what was wrong with her.
She can still remember the panic that would arise every time she was selected to read out to the class, the humiliation and insecurity.
She was later diagnosed with dyslexia.
But the damage had been done.
The thoughts and beliefs had begun to form which then went on to make life very challenging for her.
These memories which she thought were long forgotten have been impacting on her life in so many ways, not just the resistance to writing blogs or being more visible on Facebook.
We had a lot to unpack and after the first session she was able to have a deeper understanding of the connection between her emotional response to childhood and how this is showing up in her life now.
Our journey together has only just begun and I feel hugely honoured to be able to show her a technique to break the emotional pull of those early childhood memories.
A technique which will ultimately enable her to let go of these difficult emotions, to leave her feeling empowered and confident within herself, with a deep sense of peace and freedom. The result of which will free her up to write, to create content with ease, to own her true value and worth.
She is not alone.
I have come across very similar stories in the work that I do and it would be remiss of me not to point out that often what is needed is a commitment to working on these issues for a consistent period of time.
And unfortunately there is no magic number of sessions that I can say will dissolve someones blocks.
Because we are all beautifully unique.
But what I do know is that a commitment to resolving ones issues, a consistent and therapuetic approach, can and does bring about massive shifts.
If you’re ready to go deep, to face some of the difficulties that have been holding you back and committed to working through them to finding that inner peace and confidence, send me email at mailto:email@example.com , lets have a chat and see how I can help.
Feel your way back into alignment with your SOUL